Friday, October 7, 2011

Shopping

Dear friends,

I'm a hanging in here... still no routine to the way I feel, but we've said it over and over again... it is what it is.  So it worked out that I had no chemo yesterday due to really some miscommunication and in all honesty not a big deal.  When I saw my oncologist, he was quite concerned for me for (that was Tuesday). I rarely cry when I visit him and I was in pain and crying and even though we discussed our next course of action, I don't think anything really stuck from that visit.  He didn't think I would be ready by yesterday and yes I would have been, but an extra few days is really no big deal.

So, we took some of this extra time to do some "odd ball" shopping.  We went and shopped plots, coffins, cemeteries etc.  I think I have all my "wants" and "needs" figured out and I also have some peace of mind.  I'm glad that Kevin went with me and that we were able to do this together without too much emotional upheaval.  We are going to have a combined headstone with 2 plots.

For a while there I worried about a 3rd member, but I'm not going to worry about it now.  I'll let Kevin and the "3rd" person figure it out when it comes their time.

I apologize ahead of time due to the subject matter... not that fun I know.

Thank you all for continuing with me on my journey... you all deserve kudos!!!!

Until next time.

-Katie

107 comments:

Tammy Hershberger said...

No other words except to say you continue to be in my thoughts and prayers, Katie!

THE HOOSIER STAMPER said...

I will keep you in my prayers and in my heart. Wish there was more that I could do. Prayer changes things I know without a doubt. I've been a minister's daughter since I was 12 years old, and I've seen miracle over and over again in my life time so far. We don't always see the miracles, and then sometimes we do! Hang in there! Big Hugs! Leah Ann

Joan Ervin said...

Katie....my heart swells with such love and admiration for you!!! You have taken this journey with such grace....the whole stamping community is praying for you daily. May God wrap his arms around you and your family and bring you peace and joy in the days to come!!!!!

Tameko said...

Dear Katie, You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. May God continue to give you and Kevin what is needed as you navigate the details.

God Bless, Tameko

Ted said...

As long as God exists, hope and faith exists. He is eternal.

You'll remain in my prayers, Katie. You're loved by so many "strangers".

We're right here with you.

Jessrose21 said...

Katie, I haven't commented before, but I've been praying for you and following along for a couple months. First and foremost, I pray for healing, but also for your family, for peace, comfort, and for many unexpected blessings. Your courage and honesty in the face of such pain is humbling and inspiring.

Sarah said...

Katie, I don't have words right now, only tears. I continue to believe in your healing. I too have seen miracles and I am still believing in yours. Take care.

Susan said...

Oh, dear Katie. There is not much that I can add to the eloquence of all of the others. You are such a strong and amazing woman. I continue to pray for healing for you, and for peace and comfort for all of you. Thank you for allowing us to share in your intimate journey. May God wrap His loving and healing arms around you. Sue

Joan B said...

glad to see that those in your life are listening to you, including the doctor! hugs.

Gina said...

No apologies necessary Katie, people should be able to discuss these things openly, it leads to so much peace of mind :D
I know that what I'm going to suggest next will upset some people, and I truly hope it will be totally unnecessary and premature, but have you thought of scheduling a goodbye post? Date it 2020 or something, so that hubby won't feel he has to deal with it should you take a sudden bad turn. I know he has access to your blog, because he has posted for you before, so he is sure to want to let everyone know when/if anything goes wrong.
The more you can sort out in advance of bad days, the more you will be able to enjoy the good days.
Much love and strength to you all :D XXX

KarenK said...

Hi Katie,
I can't imagine the courage you have to have taken care of these details. It's such a testament to you and the love you have for your family to have made these plans ahead of time. I continue to be in such awe of your amazing fortitude, grace, and raw honesty. You and your family continue to be in my prayers. Big hugs, Karen

Jak Heath said...

I can totally understand your logic in this very unlogical time for you all, I think peace of mind that you have everything in place is an utmost. I think it must have been ever so difficult to do especially when shopping in a crafters mind normally means lots of goodies to play with.
I keep you all close to my heart Katie and my admiration for you is emmense. love you my friend.

Dana (*danavee*) said...

Love you, Katie!

Mandi said...

Katie, I've been following your blog for almost a year now and this is my first post. I wanted you to know that your courage and strength is absolutely amazing. You are a beautiful person inside and out. This may sound wrong, but I always look forward to reading your posts, your words are so open and brutally honest, you have a way of helping me put everything in this crazy world into perspective. I can only hope that if I ever find myself in your shoes that I can handle such struggles with the strength that you have shown.
My thoughts are with you, Kevin, and your boys.
Hugs, Mandi

Melissa said...

I am praying for you everyday, Katie, and I wish for you comfort and peace. ((((HUGS)))))

Susie said...

Katie, I admire your honesty so much. I don't know if you consider yourself to be a strong woman...but, oh my...you certainly are.
You are an inspiration Katie. Even though we've never met, I care so very much about you and your family. All of you continue to be in my prayers.
Big hugs, Susie

stampinganja said...

Dear Katie,
This is the first time I am writing a comment but I have been a follower of your blog before this journeys started. You are an amazing, strong, loving girl! I can write I don't know what to comment,you are going through this journey with your family and you are so strong, so real and such a blessing to all of us. My heart breaks that you have to go through this and I can only imagine how it really is for you, Katie, I have been praying for you and will keep doing that, for you, Kevin and your boys. Hugs and lots of love, Anja

Cassie said...

I think 'grace' is a good word to describe you and your journey. You've seemed to handle everything with such grace and poise. There really are no words to describe all that runs through my mind for you, Katie. . .you and your beautiful family. I will continue to lift all of you up.

Gloria Dojlido said...

You are such a "dear". I don't know what to hardly say. You are brave and strong...a true inspiration. I continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs!!! xoxoxo

Barb Gmitro-Best said...

Dear Katie - I continue to keep you and your family in my prayers. I ask for a miracle every time. You are so strong and brave. thank you for sharing your journey with us. Hugs to you! Barb

Anonymous said...

Lots and lots of hugs, love and tears for you from Illinois. You and your family are in my thoughts daily. All my co-workers ask about you and pray for you also. You have such a huge support group. We spent last Sat with Ken & Eliz ... I am glad she is on her way out to be with you and your family. Hugs to all of you. Janice

hello gorgeous said...

hello gorgeous! so many times you hear if "so and so" was here they would have loved this service...or the music...or the plot chosen for them....and in so MANY cases that is never the case, but you my lovely have been able to step forward and make those choices {and not only for you but with your family in mind too} that doesn't happen very often.

We did it with Dad {we only had four weeks tho'} and I can't tell you how calm WE all felt on the day that he knew what was in store for him.

LOTS of love to you sweetie {I am still keeping my fingers crossed for you} I really wish I could reach across and give you such a massive bear hug ;o)

hugs

hello gorgeous xxx

Whimcees said...

Dear Katie,

So many people praying for you and sending their love. Your courage and determination - your positive approach to life - your willingness to do whatever it takes to continue your fight - you are a special person Katie girl.

In this difficult time it is good that you have found some peace of mind in being able to make these decisions and put them aside.

You and your family are in my prayers every day. Sending good wishes and love to you. Stay strong.

Barbara Diane

Laura Isham said...

Oh, Katie! My heart aches reading your post. You are one of the strongest people I know. My continued love and prayers to you and your family.

Desiree said...

As I saw someone above post.....you are loved and cared for by many, many strangers. Whatever the future leads you...please know that you are uplifted by all of us in thought and prayer.

Lots of hugs.

June K said...

Katie, my heart goes out to you. Please do know that you are in my thoughts often.

Big Hugs...

Kelly S. said...

I continue to be inspired by your grace and honesty. You are so strong, and I am thinking of you and your family, Katie! Prayers and warm thoughts today and every day!

Sheri said...

You are truly my hero. You are the bravest person I know and the most thoughtful. I am still praying and hope you don't have to use your shopping items for many many years. Remember Honey, It ain't over til the fat lady sings, and I pray she is not going to sing for a long time. Love ya, Katie

Margie H said...

Oh how I agree with Sheri about those shopping items...hugs to you both for taking those steps.

Prayers of strength are enforced EVERYDAY for you!!!Love you, Katie!! xo

judy said...

No-one deserves more kudos than you
Katie, for your bravery, honesty
and strength! Keeping you in my
thoughts and prayers!!

Jessie/knightrone said...

You are so strong, and brave. My thoughts are with you, and your beautiful family.

KER said...

blessings and good vibes to you and your family/friends

Emily Painter-Davis said...

My dear, brave Katie...
I love you.
Enough said...
Em

Claire said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Claire said...

I am keeping you in my thoughts Katie,you are the bravest person I know and I admire you more every day. All my love
Claire xxxx

MicheleV said...

You deserve the kudos! I don't know if I could face each day with the courage that you have! I am a better person for having met you in blogger world! You are a very special lady!

Theresa Momber said...

Always thinking of you, Katie, and sending strength your way. This sounds like something you needed to do for you. So much is out of your control, it is important to take charge of the things you can control. You keep on fighting for time with your family. I believe in you!!! Hugs!!!

Christine said...

Katie, You are such a strong and couragous women and one that I have come to admire even though I do not know you personally. My prayers are with you and your family.

Marilyn said...

Katie I am awed by your strength, your grace, your wit, your honesty, your love for family and for those of us who have not had the pleasure of meeting you in person. Thank you so much for helping me become a better woman. Your inspiration is amazing. Along with everyone else, I am glad you are taking control of what you can and praying you have no need for your purchases for many years to come. May each of our tears be a healing prayer.

Grandma Nancy said...

I really really care about you, Katie. I'm so very sorry that you had to do that but there isn't anything I can say. Tom and I have made all our arrangements, which felt a little odd too, but we weren't sick at the time. I hope you feel all the love and prayers being sent to you and that those feelings are what help you feel at peace. Hugs, love and Prayers, friend! Nancy

Bonnie said...

Katie,
Have thought of and prayed for you daily since I started following your blog. Your stregnth is an example for us all. Your shopping spree will bring great comfort for you and your family. My Mother did this and it made her arrangements so much easier.
Wishing you peace. You aleady have lots of love.

Elaine M said...

Sweet Katie - our prayer group will continue holding you up in prayer - you amaze us with your courage and grace. May our Lord surround you and your family with His peace and strength.

Sillyfilly said...

Just know you and your family remain in my prayers and heart. Even though we are total stangers we really aren't because of your blog. I think the whole stamping community prays for you and cares about you. You are a strong and positive person. You amaze me how you have faced this disease head on. May God bless you and keep you in his loving care.
Sylvia

Robyn said...

Hi Katie- I think of you every time I go to my blog (which is often!!) I look to see if you have posted and pray for you and your family. Sending you much love from me in Australia....Robyn

Chef Mama Lori said...

Precious Katie, I'm glad you & Kevin were able to do these things now together. We'll continue to pray for a miracle, but will also pray that if there is a different answer you will be comforted, comfortable and able to spend much time with your family. I love you dearly.

Helen L said...

Wish I could be there to give you a big hug!!! You will be in my prayers and thoughts.

gramma jacki said...

Katie - it was on my birthday that you wrote this blog post. If only it could be as simple as blowing out candles and using my "wish" to heal you, it would be done. It truly is heartbreaking to read your words, to hear and feel your pain. You truly are an inspiration to many. You in my thoughts always and my wish for you is a miracle. Peace.

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie-
How brave and rational.
Let's choose life!

Linda said...

Katie, I love you and am praying. Your whole situation is such a reminder not to take any day, ever, for granted. I can not look at any any person I love and not be aware that we could be a day away from knowing that we are on the same journey that you are. I am so sorry for the pain you are going through.
No other words, I am so afraid something I say will add to the pain, just I love and admire you so much.

Donna said...

It must have been so difficult Katie, its one of those things we just don't like to think about, choosing our coffin,plot etc but it would make it easier on family if we did. You are an extremely brave and beautiful woman, I always have you in my thoughts. hugs Donna x

Mary Sabo said...

Katie,
You are such a strong and courageous woman. Thank you for sharing your strength with us. Know that prayers are being said in your name. Love you! XOXOX

Pam~ said...

Dearest Katie...The strength, courage, and compassion you show/write is remarkable and touching. You are loved by this stamping community and have touched the lives of many people. Your posts are always the first I read when I get on Google reader. My heart breaks, you bring smiles to my face, and you have taught me so much about life. For that, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Keep up this great fight and know that you and your family are in my prayers. Hugs to you...

Cath said...

Love you so much, dear, sweet, brave, honest Katie.

Pony and Petey said...

I thank God for your openness and honesty. This beautiful way that you are approaching the end of your life here on earth is inspiring to me. I know that if God wills that I, too, have a terminal disease, I will do my very best to follow your example!

I wish SO much that I could do something more for you... to brighten your life like you have mine. Is there anything special that your boys would enjoy? Or your husband? Please let us know if we can help in some other way besides our thoughts and prayers!

Lorraine said...

Your strength and courage are amazing, Katie. You are an inspiration to so many - most of whom you have never met. Thank you for your openness & honesty through this rough journey. There are so many of us that continue to pray & send positive vibes your way.

Jennie said...

Sending gentle hugs Katie...thankful you were able to deal with the odd ball shopping as it is something that brought you some peace of mind. Praying for you and your dear family.

Debbie Olson said...

Katie, dear Katie. . . My heart aches for you, but your courage inspires me. I am praying for you.

There She Goes Clear Stamps said...

I am sending so much love to you and your family Katie! You are an amazing women and inspire so many with your strength and courage <3

Davi said...

Katie, Big hugs to you as you take care of some of the more difficult things of life. Your courage to share your journey is a amazing testimony of your strength. Praying that you will have relief from the pain.

Jeanne said...

Sending love and hugs and prayers, Katie.

Chris Wooten said...

Katie prayers going up to heaven every day for you and family. Hugs Katie...I know it is a scary journey,

Winnie said...

I have been reading and praying, but this is my first post. I want you to know that I think you are a lot like my late husband who fought the battle and as hard as the final "shopping" as you so nicely put it he and I did it together. I always remember how he made it bearable for me by doing it with me and I know he was aware of what plans were in place for him (and I when the time comes). It really did bring peace to him, and to me when the time came... Now that it is done, you can go back to concentrating on that wonderful hubby and family. I wish you peace and comfort and continued love from everyone.

LouLou said...

Katie, my heart is heavy with sadness for you and your family. Please know that you are in my thoughts!
Sending love and hugs across the Ocean. KEEP FIGHTING KATIE!

donna calamari said...

Dear katie, You do so much for all of us. You continually teach us grace and bravery and honesty. You inspire us to love those around us and treasure our lives. You have brought out the best in all of us. It is not your illness that has moved us so; it is you who has. You are remarkable and you have made an indelible mark on us all.

True :) said...

Katie,
You continue to inspire me with your grace and honesty. Your family and friends are so blessed to have had you in our lives. I will continue to pray for you and your family.
You have been so strong and courageous through all of this....stay that way my friend!

Hugs,
True :D

~amy~ said...

Oh Katie...you guys are in my thoughts...your honesty is a true inspiration.

Curt in Carmel said...

Again, another thoughtful, selfless act from you dear Katie. I can't imagine the strength it takes to do what you've done. My heart breaks for you and for Kevin and the kids. How very hard this has all been for all of you, and yet you have faced it with such dignity, courage, and strength. You are truly one amazing human being. Hugs, Curt

Chantell said...

You and your family are in my prayers.

Chantell - South Africa

Lori Craig said...

I'm reminded every time you chat with us: This is what courage and grace look like. Sending you love ~ Lori

Kim said...

Katie,

Do you have a donation account set up? That goes specifically to you?

I would very much like to help.

Hugs,
Kim

EllenH said...

You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers - sending my love Katie!

Anonymous said...

You are one tough lady. I'm at a loss for something to say - other than that I'm amazed at how you deal with this situation. I do not pray but I'm sending all sorts of positive energies your way. And towards the rest of the family.

Novell said...

I wish I knew what to say, but I don't. I'm just winging it. Thank you for carrying us through this journey with you and your family. Thank you for keeping it real and keeping it honest with the good, bad, and the ugly. Thinking of you....

cbuswell said...

Love you Katie. x

Lydia said...

Your strength amazes me, Katie. Hang in there girl. (((((hugs)))))

Edith said...

Many, many warm hugs and my praying from afar.
Love, Edith

flourishes said...

Katie, you are such a brave lady. Thank you for teaching so many of us these lesson in life. I pray for peace and blessing to you, Kevin the children.
Jan Marie
Flourishes

Barbara said...

Prayers for you and know that we are with you

Janine said...

God bless you - he certainly seems to be giving you some amazing strength. Katie - I pray he gives you healing too. xxx

Linda Carson said...

Prayers for you Kathie and your precious family.

Debgem said...

Keeping you in my thoughts and sending postive vibes your way. You are truly inspirational - a special lady. Sending you hugs xx

sandi said...

There isn't much more I can say, My prayers are with you and your beautiful family. Stay strong!!

pattyo said...

Let me tell you that not a night goes by since I first read your blog in January that I haven't said a special prayer just for you and will continue to do so. You simply are amazing! Keep up the fight.

Jenny said...

I don't have many words, not much I can say when you choke up. My prayers are with you right now for you and your family. Sending long distance hugs ... you are an amazing person.

Anonymous said...

I echo the words of so many others...you are truly an inspiration and a great example of living each day to your fullest. Your honesty in sharing this journey is incredible and I'm sure that many of us will remember things you have told us. Your dignity and grace during a difficult time inspires me to do the same. God is good and miracles do happen! So many prayers are being said for you and your family. I wish you peace, comfort and happiness.

Geny said...

Keep fighting Katie! Lots of hugs going out to you!

Sharli said...

Katie,
You are so amazing - so honest and so caring! I am inspired and humbled by you. I pray for you and your family and for myself, too, as I want to be as strong and thoughtful as you are.
Love.

Jane said...

You are one in an a million Katie, think you too deserve Kudo's...keep fighting xx

Cheryl (aka CherylQuilts) said...

Heard about your story from the blogs and agree with Jan Marie's comment above. Praying for you and your precious family!

Anonymous said...

I have been reading your blog for close to a year now. Even though I do not know you personally, I admire your strength and send prayers from the Midwest. Your writing is beautiful no matter what the topic. Peace to you and your family.

A fellow stamper and card maker

Susan said...

oh, my Katie...found your blog thru Lilybean Paperie & had to read it....you're 1 **strong**gal; I admire you & your family; TFS your personal journey of this horrible C word! HUgs from Canada.

Lee said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. You first inspired me with your beautiful crafts and now you continue to be an inspiration in the way you conduct your life. Lots of love and hugs to you xxx

Anonymous said...

Be strong Katie, you are an inspiration to us all. Lots of Hugs x

Scrapping Galaxy said...

My heart goes out to you and your family. Continuing to keep you in prayer. Your strength continues to inspire me.

Veronica said...

Dear Katie
Along with so many others, I am sending Love, Hope, Strength and Peace to you and your family. You are such an inspiration! My prayers are with you. Please remember that nothing is impossible for our Heavenly Father.
Love and warm hugs.

Kathy said...

Hi Katie,
I've been out-of-town for 3 weeks visiting my mom and 97 yr. old grandmother in Phoenix!! I leave to go home tomorrow but just couldn't wait another day to check on you...it's been eons! I know choosing headstone markers and plots is not fun but I am glad you are thinking ahead. It is so hard to think of this road for you, Katie but I know the Lord is sovereignly in control and He alone knows the beginning and end of our days. I'm so glad you've been able to pick up the boys from school. Everyday life is precious, isn't it?
Just want you to know you're in my prayers,
much love and hugs,
Kathy

Mandi-Lee said...

Katie, I have been following your journey for quite some time now from behind the scenes. I am absolutely in awe of the amazing woman that you are. I have taken this journey twice before with my mother and then my mother in law. I wish you continued strength and the utmost of courage as you continue your journey! You are such an inspiration. I send to you much love and good wishes from the other side of the world! My thoughts and prayers are with you always. Mandi xxx

Linda said...

You are a loving, strong lady whom I have grown to love and admire without even meeting you. It must have been a difficult day. Yet, it has to be comforting knowing you have taken charge of important decisions. It must have given Kevin some peace knowing you made the choices together. Hang in there girl, keep fighting. We love you, Linda C

Anonymous said...

Dearest Katie,

You and your husband are so brave . You are so courageous.I think of your everyday, and look for blog updates.

Much love to you and your family during such a tough time. Bless you Katie.

much love

Deborah F

ThePurplePlace said...

Bless your heart! You have to be one of the most amazing women I have ever met! I'm so sorry that you even have to think of such things, but truly admire your courage and strength.

You'll continue to be in my thoughts and prayers...

Dinahsoar said...

I've never met you but as I write these words tears are pouring. My heart goes out to you.

It's always darkest before the dawn, and where ever your dawn is Katie--on this side or the other- I hope and pray it is the best and brightest, all that you have longed for and imagined.

I continue to pray for your complete healing. God is able to deliver you should he choose.

You are doing your part with fortitude and courage. Many are being touched by your courage and hopefully we are all counting our blessings because life is fleeting.

Rest dear girl and gather strength for the next bend in the road.

Jayne said...

Dear Katie, I too watched you from afar though your blogging over the past year or so. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Regards, Jayne.

Barb- NICUGypsy said...

you truly are a brave and remarkable woman. You have an amazing ability to comfort those of us who follow your trials from afar while we try desperately try to comfort you and lift you up. I will always remember your courage and willingness to share your journey with so many strangers who consider you a dear friend (at least I do). You have found a place in my heart and I continue to wish for you pain free days and the strength to go on.

Stephanie Eaken said...

I just heard of your story & have been so touched by all of the crafting community's love for you. You are in my thoughts & prayers also. I pray for strength for you & your family in this awful ordeal. Love & hugs.

America said...

Oh Katie... I dont know you either but have followed your heart touching story. As a mom and wife and crafter myself, it's very painful and sad. I pray for you and your family with hopes you will find peace. GOD will never leave you. Big Hugs to you sweetie.

Carolyn King said...

xo Is about all I can muster. I have no eloquent words at this time. xo Praying for you, your husband and children...

Grace said...

Katie,
I have you and your family in my prayers. I wish I could pray and a miracle could happen for you and your family; and you'll get better. I've been reading your post and I'm tearing up. I'm a health care professional and every time a patient has to go through what you've been through, I still cry.
I pray that God will take good care of your health.
hugs from canada

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